CONTINUED.. from my Jewelry page. I like to post topics and subjects that I find interesting. I also like to share these with my fans. I felt it necessary to have this little public statement.. LOL!
So there is a story in the press right now about a college professor who brought her sick infant to the first day of class. The child was sick, therefore couldn't go to daycare and she didn't want to miss the first day. Cut to the baby who began to cry so she did what she thought was appropriate to soothe the situation. GIVE the baby the BOOB.
Here's the thing... I don't think this is the place.. 18 & 19 yr old kids are probably not going to respect you as an authority or educator no matter how right or wrong public feeding is when you whip it out for all to see. For instance a professor with a crop top exposing a her belly button; liberal, creative, whatever, they are students, they need to study their books not your freckles. I don't like most parents would tolerate going to parent-teacher conferences and the teacher has a micro-mini on with her cash and prizes almost exposed. (no matter how young and physically fit, btw do you p90x, I digress, about spelling and math) I can't image giving a presentation or hosting a jewelry party and trying to look professional in a room of even peers with no cover while breastfeeding. I don't want to say there is a time and place but if your walking around the mall and stop by a bench, THAT, in my opinion is different than being in the role of a professional and already the center of attention. (like giving a speech).
This topic got pretty powerful on my jewelry page and then was taken down. If your goal as a PRO-boob mom/women is to have people NOT make a big deal of it then you go and force it on people and throw the situation in their face you are not doing what you set out for. You are creating the opposite, you are making it a big deal and a publicity stunt. If you want to nurse your child in public, by all means. Should you announce to the restaurant " I'm gonna breast feed now, if it offends you LOOK AWAY"........ NOOOOOO!!! You can't force things on people they lose respect for the very action you are there to protect and justify.
For instance, I'll be honest with you.. I didn't breast feed my girls (enter gasps, shrieks and sighs, I know. ) If that makes me an unfit mother or bad mother in your eyes, what a sad world you must live in to judge people. My reason why, you ask. Well, I didn't want to. I have had a reconstructive surgery to one breast which doesn't function and it was just not for me. I couldn't wrap my head around it and I think that's fine. Do what works for you. Are my girls healthy? YES. When nurses and other mother's gave me the "you really should, its better. Reconsider it for the child's benefit" lecture honestly it infuriated me. Your attempt to "educate me" made me uncomfortable with your role as my peer for attempting to take the pride and instinct for raising my child as I feel necessary away from me. It should be just as much your choice TO breastfeed as mine NOT to. I don't want you pushing your "belief" on me, just as I don't come to you and tell you, your kid should have a coat on it's breezy outside and they MAY catch a cold" You'd look at me like- WHO THE HELL... I think you should do what is comfortable and comes natural to you, especially as a parent. We use our instincts, we rely on our body to tell us what to do and what feels right. (My body was like... UMM yea can we talk about this whole suckling thing, not so much into it.)
It's just one of those topics. Is it right, wrong, justified, controversial.. I don't know. All I know is I did what was right for me and in the case of the teacher, it may have been right for her and the infant but when students are paying for your time and knowledge I think this could have been handled differently. I just know that my personality is like " hey if the shoe fits", "whatever floats your boat", "don't knock it til' you try it". The shoe was too small, my boat sunk and I tried it and it wasn't happening. I just get upset when people judge an action rather than an intention.. Like the teacher- is the boob a HORRIBLE thing.. no, was the action permissible, I don't know. Was the intention good- THAT is up for debate, did she throw it in their face to make a point or statement? Who knows? Should an infant be in a lecture hall at a college? Probably not. If I were one of the parents paying $900 for that class and the teacher is dividing the time between lecture and nursing, I'd be pretty upset, just like if she had been texting or knitting.
Regardless that is my piece. I love being a mom, I love my girls and I love being a women. I don't think anyone can take that away from me. Women are passionate, motivated and strong, I don't think I need to prove it to people on a stage, I think the delivery room visit did that for me already.
Just my venting for the day.. It's not meant to offend or choose sides of right and wrong. I am simply expressing what my thought is and what my choice was. ((hearts)) Lauren
I agree with you. I breastfed my daughter for the first 4 weeks (hospital gave her a bottle after I had her. Didn't see her for 4 hours). I had to stop because I wasn't producing enough. She didn't get sick until she was 11 months old. After that for another 2 years (allergies excluded). With my son, I breastfed for the first 2 1/2 months until I stopped producing. I felt like people would judge me when I went out because I wasn't popping out the boob or because they saw me mix a bottle with formula. My son has had more problems (ear infections my daughter never had, allergic reactions to medicines) than my daughter who was breastfed less. I just don't get why people are so quick to judge. If you don't want to, that's fine and if you do, then that's fine as well. It doesn't make you a better person but for some reason, people thinks that it does.
ReplyDelete(My body was like... UMM yea can we talk about this whole suckling thing, not so much into it.) By far my fav line!! I breast Fed my first for 17months and quit when I was pregnant with #2 I felt like I would be judged because I wanted my boobs to myself for a bit and made my daughter quit cold Turkey. Spure of the moment I decided I was done! I think there are health benefits and encourage women to try it. my main reason for doing it is cause I'm cheap! Why pay for formula when I can make milk for free?!~Brenda Scarlet
DeleteI wasn't given a choice, my body refuses to breast feed. You have no idea how many times I've heard the lecture about "breast is best". I've even had women (yes, more than one) stop me in the store to tell me how a "real" mom wouldn't result to formula feeding. I was only 20 when I had my first, I felt horrible, like I had failed. One day, I decided I'd had enough. I was at the store purchasing formula and a woman breast feeding without a cover came up to me and had something to say. I couldn't even pay attention to what she was saying, I mean, here she is in the middle of the store shoving her uncovered breast in my face. My only response was, "at least I'm feeding my kid!"
ReplyDeleteYou're right, by being so uppity and confrontational, people will stop listening. No one will care about what your message is. They are far to offended at your actions to hear to your words. I imagine it's similar for the classroom mentioned. I was a single mom, if my kid was too sick for daycare, I couldn't take her to work, I had to find other arrangements. Besides, if your child is sick - keep them at HOME. No use exposing more people than necessary.
I have far more respect for those that stop at a bench and cover themselves, not because I'm offended by breast feeding or even breasts, but because you are out in public. You can't control who walks by or what will be seen if you leave yourself exposed.